I’m trying to get back into running the smart way – listening to my body and skipping a day on the plan when my knees, which never gave me trouble before, are complaining loudly that I am old and broken.

So this morning I decided to do yoga instead of a scheduled run/walk. I’ve been doing Zoom yoga in my little ‘nest’ area at home since pandemic time sent me away from warm, cozy and friendly yoga studios. It’s good, and bad, to be able to listen to an awesome instructor and move through a practice at home.

And today, we got into pigeon pose near the end, and we held it long enough for the muscles and tension to start to release. And then it hit me – a great sadness that had been held so tightly in my body. A realization that ‘USELESS‘ was a big trigger for me. I feel like it is the worst thing I could possibly be. And I am sure that there are echos of people in my past calling me useless.

I suspect that fight to be ‘useful’ instead has driven me to work work work, to give give give, and too often to neglect self-care and self-love. I feel I am only valuable on the planet for what I *do*, not for who I *am*.

But this weekend, a tiny crack appeared and the light started peeking in. I’m doing an awesome weekend project with the amazing Melody Ross, and it starts with I AM A SOUL. (check it out!)

Melody’s life mission is pretty much to help us all remember that we are SOULS, and brave amazing souls at that. I love her and her work heals me. Just by my existence as a soul, I am never useless, right?!

So here we go….